Went to Ayala mall area last Saturday to go grocery shopping with mommy and do a little Christmas shopping…or should I say start with my Christmas shopping since I haven’t gotten anyone anything yet. While I was driving along the longest parking lot that is EDSA, I realized some things about Christmas. Then I realized that in 1997, I wrote a similar entry in my High School journal - a journal we were all forced to fill up with our pensive teenage reflections for English class. And 10 years later, here I am thinking the same thoughts again. Either Christmas in
1. Christmas time in
2. It also means = “Time to Exploit the Shoppers” season for taxi drivers as they shift to “Drive Like An Ass” gear while slinking their way around like the vile conniving snakes that they are.
3. I also realized, while staring at the back of a REVO for a full 20 minutes that REVO is actually OVER spelled backwards while
4. I also realized that my mom is still a backseat driver. And she still gets mad when I try to make like a taxi driver and “drive like an ass.”
5. And that sometimes even if you dress up curse words as Crap! Sheet! Fuuuudge! Puch! and wish those drivers would die or crap their pants or die with crap in their pants, your mom will still shush you.
6. When I got to the parking lot, just like in my 1997 journal, people were fighting over parking spaces. There was this guy who was literally screaming his lungs off while cursing this lady who took his spot. And another couple fighting with a teenager, you guessed it, over a parking spot. Which made me sigh. How ironic. Christmas is the time to give and share and the time to be nice and not naughty. But cases like this usually happen only around Christmas time.
7. When I entered the mall I saw what felt like a gazillion kids buying toys and clothes. Christmas is indeed for children. Naughty or nice. And their parents will do everything, to make their children’s Christmas a happy one – fight over parking space, over the last toy in stock, over who goes first at the line at the cashier. Which is good because it’s the only time during the year when parents show their little gremlins how much they care.
8. I also realized that I have 6 godchildren and I still have no gifts for them.
9. Which sent me to a panicked frenzy. So I made a list of gifts to buy and rushed around buying the nicest presents I could find (that fit my budget). So I realized how year after year, I resolve to shop early but I still end up rushing like there was only one week til Christmas. And yes it’s true.
10. Some people (the really dorky ones) who shop one month before Christmas end up floating around the mall like butterflies with all the time in the world. Which totally pissed me off. I actually had a little spat with one of them who looked like she was on dope, staring off into space and holding up the line like her world was in slow mo.
11. That NOT all SM ladies ask you if you have an SM Advantage card. Hah! I finally found one who totally forgot to ask me.
12. That when I badly need to shop, I have trouble finding good stuff to buy but when I window shop I find things that I totally drool over but can’t buy.
13. That some salesladies are just totally blah. They don’t know what the hell they’re selling or just don’t understand what you’re looking for. And some of them are just so inaudible you just want to tell them to get out of the sales industry if they can’t speak up.
14. That I hear Jose Mari Chan during Christmas every single year whenever I see girls and boys selling lanterns on the street…
15. That the kids who sing carols at you doorstep usually sing the same medley you know the one that starts with “Sa May Bahay…” followed by “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” and “Thank you..thank you, ang babait ninyo thank you.”
16. That during Christmas I’m usually grumpy. Like the Grinch. Or the grumpy dwarf and the Grumpy Bear that doesn’t care. Or Ebenezer Scrooge. I’m like the Nightmare Before Christmas.
But don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas. It’s my favorite time of the year. And I will rejoice and celebrate the birthday of Jesus. But the rejoicing will not be as jolly or as merry. Not this year. With Chev on the other side of the world, I just don’t feel the spirit of Christmas. I can’t take the distance and I can’t take all this holiday cheer.