Chronicles of Maya 4: Angsty Juvenile Poetry

While cleaning out my old stuff, I found this piece of paper with a poem written on it. I recognized it as my handwriting from way way back. I probably wrote it for Sir Sam's High School English class. I just realized that this poem could have been the beginning of my life as an angsty "Emily the Strange"-like teenager. And that with this poem, Sir Sam could have sent me to see the school psych-person. It's so much fun finding old stuff. They're like relics from your past, in this case, one decade (or more) ago. My own piece of history. Don't laugh at my juve-y words. I think I was inspired by the song "My Favorite Things" and I read too much Sweet Dreams and Anne Rice books. But yeah go ahead. It's amusing. This makes me look like a disturbed kid when in fact I wasn't. I was just...what's the word? Morbid. It has no title. So I just made one up.

tough love

loving you is like a cup of hot chocolate on a cold rainy night
a gentle sweet kiss after a weary fight
it's like a big present wrapped up in dainty strings
a bunch of freshly picked flowers on a warm day in spring

it's like fluffy pink nightgowns with matching pink slippers
a furry little kitten with long silver whiskers
white lace with pearls on a blushing bride's gown
a party with balloons, cake and a red-nosed clown (ugh!)

loving you is like stars shining brightly in the evening sky
waiting on the porch steps for the ice cream man to pass by
ice cold lemonade on a sweaty hot day
innocent little toddlers, in the sandbox, at play

it's like watching a murder with your eyes unclosed
taking cocaine until you're overdosed
puking your brains out after twelve vodka tonics
burning the school down while the principal panics

helping an old lady cross a busy street
then snatching her bag and tripping her feet
it's like treating some orphans to a good Christmas feast
then telling them "Hey kids, Santa doesn't exist"

loving you is easy, loving you is hard
getting kissed and hugged, bruised up and scarred
medicine for pain, pain that won't go away
cancer that spreads in you with each passing day

loving you is sweet
loving you is tough
loving you is everything
yet it ain't enough.

A Poem About Men

i haven't posted in quite a while. no time to write. i have a bunch of unfinished works. not inspired to finish them either. but i received this in my inbox and i knew i just had to post it. i do not agree with everything this poem says but i think you'd know which ones i strongly agree with. for the ladies and the men. just some insights on how to play the game of love :)

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Slower is better
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends".
A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.
If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.
Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job.
Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs. - some men are bitches hehe
You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.
You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage...
Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.
Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him he takes it for granted.
Never move into his mother's house.
Never co-sign for a man.
Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.